A Randomly Selected Newspaper Headline:

The following is a randomly selected newspaper headline from many years ago:

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Friday, May 17, 2013

Gonna Be a Bear


I don't know the source for this except to say it was going around my Grandma's retirement complex.
"Gonna Be a Bear . . . . 

 "In this life I'm a woman.  In my next life I'd like to come back as a bear.  When you're a bear you get to hibernate.  You do nothing for six months.  I could live with that.

 "Before you hibernate, you're supposed to eat yourself stupid.  I could deal with that too.

 "When you're a girl bear you birth your children (who are the size of walnuts) while you're sleeping and wake to partially grown cute, cuddly cubs.  I could definately deal with that.

 "If you're a mama bear, everyone knows you mean business.  You swat everyone who bothers your cubs.  If your cubs get out of line you swat them too.  I could deal with that.

 "If you're a bear your mate Expects you to wake up growling.  He Expects that you will have hairy legs and excess body fat.  Yep, gonna be a bear!"
Posted by at 10:59 AM

2 comments:

  1. JosjeMay 17, 2013 at 5:03 PM

    That sounds like a great idea, haha!

    ReplyDelete
  2. MarisaMay 20, 2013 at 10:47 PM

    you do realize that they eat their scat you might wanna rethink this, you might luck out and be born a man then you'd really have problems. (hehehehe..just kidding)

    ReplyDelete

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